Mr. Adventure says

My husband, herein called Mr. Adventure, will thus entertain you with glimpses into the male mind. 

He calls it his baby. I call it the death machine. 

• Upon Mr. Adventure's arrival home 

B: Hey.
Me: Mmm
B: Seriously, you had all day to play with your iphone. Hi would be nice?
Me: I'm looking up an article you have to read since you just got here.
B: Whats it about?
Me: Justin Bieber.
B: What do you DO all day?
(Note, the article was about the new "fair market" tax that is going around, I was just picking on poor Mr. Adventure)

• The next morning 

Me: Hey, have you seen my iphone?
B: *looks sheepish*
Me: Uh, hello? Do you have my phone?
B: I hid it.
Me: WHAT?
B: Yeah. instead of playing with it all day maybe you could wash the sheets?
Me: WHERE IS MY IPHONE!

• Discussing why I've been irritable lately 

Me: I think I'm starting my period?
B: Why don't you just have a comma this time?

• When out shopping with a friend, trying to find something she liked

B: She makes everything so hard.
Me: @_o
B: OMG! DON'T SAY IT!
Me: Thats...
B: AHHHHHHHHHHHH *covers ears*
me: what she said...
B:*facepalm*

Mr. Adventure with his two favorite things: Coffee and Wifey :P

• When I was reading a book on the couch 

Me: Why are you pinching me?
B: I just wanted to see if you were real.
Me: Uh, shouldn't you have figured that out before we got married?

• A few moments later

Me: You can stop pinching me now.
B: I haven't figured it out yet.

----
Want more of Mr. Adventure? There is a part one, two, three, and four, all here just for you :)