I think, what God is teaching me...

I think what God is teaching me in this season is to be content in all things, and to give joy in all things. 

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." (James 1)

Well, I don't know that my life has faced much persecution but I have definitely faced many trials, from my own selfishness to my toxic and controlling mother in law... there have been many valleys in that department. I suppose I should thank her for the lessons in patience and forbearance she has taught me. Her name is Ruth, which I find ironic given the origins of that name in a biblical sense. I wish she was more like that Ruth. 

Anyway I was thinking of her the other day when someone at church mentioned they have dinner at that their in-laws twice a month. What a blessing that would be to me if I had that kind of relationship with my mother in law. What a nice break it would be, what companionship! But we don't, and I think we never will. Instead I got a nagging, lying manipulator for a mother in law who seems to resent the very fact that I have married her son and taken him away from her. Every encounter with her is a battle--she makes it that way no matter what I do. After what I have experienced with her, I know now all the things not to do when my son and daughters begin dating. There is a reason Brian has never had a good relationship with her. There is a reason he never tells her anything and hid his entire life from her as a teen and young adult. At least I have established excellent boundaries with her. We don't allow her over and we don't visit. We see her at church, and that's it, and it's only because she attends there. I won't allow her to come between my children and me or my marriage.

Reuben is starting flag football this weekend. I hope I did not make a mistake signing up for this. There will be 1-2 practices a week in the evening and one game every Saturday. It is quite the commitment for this homeschooling mom of two with a baby in tow, especially someone with a chronic illness who dislikes leaving the house after 5pm. I am hopeful that Brian can take him to some of the practices. I am hopeful he will make friends. I am hopeful I won't get burnt out. We are in the last six weeks of school here--and flag football lasts eight weeks so, the discontinuation of school will make football much easier. I still need to go get him cleats. And a mouth guard. Or two mouth guards. They are required to play and I want to have a back up for sure. 

God is teaching me patience in other ways too. He is teaching me to wait for healing for Reuben. He's come so far but he has so far to go. He can halfway breathe out of his nose now. He's doing osteopathic neuromuscular manipulation with Alison at CHS in town and it's helping so much! And he is getting an arch expander in 4 weeks. So much happening this year--so much potential for healing. And I'm praying for his healing so he can be a strong man one day and a healthy one too. I am trusting in the Lord, where my trust should be! 

 Taking time to write is cathartic. Perhaps words are all the friends I need at this time.